Adrian's Proposal

Happy Tuesday, everyone!

In the last post, I said I'd save the proposal story for its own post.  So, for the first time ever, my blogging self is fulfilling my blogging word.  Here it is, as promised....

*Warning*

This portion was taken from our wedding website, so it is written in third-person.  :)

When did it happen?

Friday, March 29, 2013

How it Happened!!!

Adrian had offered to watch Rainbow (Ava's oldest daughter) that evening while Chrissy (Ava's best friend) and Ava went out to get their hair done.  After getting all fixed up with her make-up on and her hair done, Ava went back to Adrian's parent's home to pick up him and Rainbow.  The plan was to go "hang out" at and casually look at rings.  Adrian says to Ava, "We need to talk."  Surely those words would strike fear in the heart of anyone.  They go out walking, leaving Rainbow with Adrian's father and Chrissy. 

Adrian started getting nervous and winded as they walked.  Ava asked him repeatedly if he was ok or if something was wrong, as he continued to reassure her everything was fine.  He noticed how far away the park was and decided they should just drive.  It' was nighttime when they arrived at Daniel Park in Beebe.  He lead her around the park until they reached the walkway to the gazebo.  Ava said, "Oh this is where I chickened out on Valentine's Day because I was freezing."  She was laughingly referring to the surprise date he had planned on Valentine's Day to watch a romantic movie at the gazebo, where they left the park half-way through the movie becauuse it was just too cold.  Adrian led her to the center of the gazebo and started telling Ava of his love for her and her daughters, how amazing she was, and how he adored her.  He went on to say, "What is the sun without the moon?  What is the sky without the stars?  What is the grass without the (long pause)..............ground!?"  Adrian then got down on one knee as he pulled something out of his pocket.  He said, "Will you marry me?"  A small pop could be heard as he removed the object from its container.  He lifted it up revealing it was a....Toy Ring!  Ava threw her head back in laughter.  Trying to quickly regain her composure, she replied, "Yes, of course I will marry you!" 

After quite a big of laughing, giggles, and excitement, the two returned to his parent's home. They made the initial announcement to those present and shared in their joy.  Adrian remarked on how he knew Ava was "The One" because she said yes to a toy ring.  This definitely appealed to the comedian side of him.  They soon departed to go shopping for that perfect ring...together.

Wow. Where did the time go?

I've pretty much proven myself to be an inconsistent blogger, at best.  Haha!  But here we go again!  I had a friend at work tell me about how she used to read my blog, and how encouraging it was to her.  It inspired me to write again!  So here we go.....

Where do I even begin?  Ok so here's the nutshell version:
July 2012 - I run into this guy that I had a HUGE crush on in Jr. High and High School at a local coffee shop he volunteered at.  He loves Jesus.  He starts talking about the Holy Spirit speaking to him when he's on stage doing his comedy routine...and suddenly he had my attention. 
August 2012 - I felt led to start going to this new church. Turns out this guy goes there, too.  I started my first semester back at ASU-Beebe, working towards a teaching degree.
September 2012 - Money was super tight.  I had no idea how I was even making it by most days.  God was faithful and provided our every last need, including money needed for school.  "That Guy", Adrian, asks me out on a date.  We started dating and our first official "date" is September 7th.
October 2012 - Everyday relying on God, busting my tail in my college classes, spending as much time as possible with my kids.  Adrian and I had our first kiss and officially decided to get together in a relationship on October 10th.
November 2012 - Lots of college, good times with the kids when I wasn't studying.  My birthday was Nov. 19th.  Adrian treated me to going out for ice cream and we watched "White Christmas" together.  It was the first time I'd seen it.  Adrian's extended family came down for Thanksgiving.  So they had what they called, "Thanksmas" (Thanksgiving/Christmas).  First time I met all the family....talk about nervous!
December 2012 - Finished up my first semester back at ASU with a 16 hour load and a 4.0 GPA!!!!!  Adrian spent our first Christmas together, and the girls and I had our first Christmas back in Arkansas.  It was absolutely amazing!
January 2013 - Started back at ASU for the spring semester.  Doing my college student thing again.  Adrian and I started getting a bit more serious.
February 2013 - Good month, busy with classes.  Had the best Valentine's Day ever, hands down!!!  Adrian busted his tail cooking me dinner, afterwards taking me to the park with blankets and a movie on the portable dvd player!  It was so romantic!  All except for the fact that my toes were freezing in the cold air and we had to leave before the movie was done since I was frozen!  Random note: the movie was Sweet Home Alabama!
March 2013 - Had a great month, a nice spring break.  Adrian and I got engaged on March 29th, 2013!!!!!!  The proposal story is great!  But I'll save that for its own post later.
April 2013 - This was a very exciting month, as we were helping friends of our who were getting married on the beach.  I was maid of honor and he was the best man.  The couple had a beautiful wedding on the beach and we were honored to be a part of their special day!  To add even more goodness, this was my first time, EVER, to see the ocean!!!  It was magical!  And I got to share it with Adrian.  The back-story here is that when I was 13 years old, I prayed that God would allow me to see the ocean for the first time with the man I was supposed to spend the rest of my life with.  Interestingly enough, I had never seen it with my ex-husband.  Opportunity has presented itself, but it never worked out.  I bet I know why!!!  ;)
May 2013 - I finished out the semester at ASU with another 4.0 GPA!!!!!  Rockin' it out!!!  I was so excited!  I never did that in high school or as a college freshman.  It was quite an accomplishment for me, as a single mother with 2 children, ages 1 and 4.  As school finished up, so began the throes of wedding planning for Adrian and I.  Also, we felt God leading us to start attending church at The River in Judsonia, AR. 
June 2013 - Time with my kids, wedding planning to the max, thanking Jesus for a change of pace! It was also great to start seeing old faces of people I cared about at The River.  I had no idea how much I missed this amazing part of the body of Christ!
July 2013 - Wedding planning continued and Adrian and I tried to spend as much time together as possible.  I continued to spend tons of time with my girls, it was such a blessing.  God used this time to draw me nearer to Him.  I started a new job working at The Heritage Company on July 29th!
August 2013 - Well, here we are.  It's August.  First off, it's just hit me the past few days that I'm getting married next month.  To the man of my dreams, nonetheless!  I can't believe I can say that...NEXT month!!!  Wedding crunch time is here and I'm feeling the pressure.  It's the time where it all comes down to what its gonna be.  Deadlines, final payments, dress fittings, attendant gifts, sending final invitations, finalizing the menu...and the list goes on.  Reminding myself that it will be a successful wedding day, as long as I'm ending it as Mrs. Adrian Rogers.  :))))))
Second off, I'm excited about my new job!  Excitement tempered with a good deal of nerves.  My perfectionist style is good for my employer in that I will do my absolute darndest to do job to the best of my ability, right down to the wire.  On the other hand, it can feel like I'm playing Russian roulette.  I've just got to remember that I'm NEW.  And on top of that, as long as I'm giving it my best, working as unto God and not unto man, I can sleep at night knowing I am doing a good job.  Reminding myself not to be so self-critical is key here.  Prayer for me here would be appreciated!  I'm very blessed to have this job and am extremely thankful for the opportunity.  My prayer is just that God would use me there as a light, and I will give God all for glory for everything that I am able to accomplish.

***Change of Subject***

You know, God has raised up a generation for such a time as this.  I keep hearing "such a time as this" everywhere.  And well, it doesn't have to be super special and all glamorous.  It can be as simple as a smile given to someone having a hard day at work, or a "way to go!".  It can be a helping hand to someone at Wal-Mart, struggling to reach groceries.  It can be that simple willingness to throw it all on the line to help a friend in need of emotional support.  It's not hard.  It's love.  If we are abiding in Jesus, we should be walking in Love.
" Beloved, let us love one another, for love is of God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God."  - 1 John 4:7

So that's where I'm at, ya'll.  Let's go and love some people today.  Let's walk like the God of the universe is living inside us...because He is!

Well, let's play catch up, shall we?

Let's do just that.

2012 - you were such a terrible and wonderful year!  I went through a very painful divorce, watched my baby Ladybug turn into a 1 year old, started back to college working on a teaching degree, and began a relationship with the most amazing man I've ever met.  

This blog was filled with emotionally-packed information throughout the past year.  And while I cannot honestly write without spilling my heart, I want a new direction this year.  You see, this year will be a year of restoration and setting things back in the right place.  This year will be a year to press forward and regain the territory taken from the enemy of the Christian faith.  This year is will be a year of pressing into the depths of the Father's heart and discovering His will for my life at every moment.  God began a work in me in the summer of 2012, and I am fully confident that I will see the fullness of that work in 2012.  So I am committing to seeing this blog take on a new life this year so that it may bring God more glory.  

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"Now godliness with contentment is great gain."  - 1 Timothy 6:6

This is how I'm starting out the year, with this verse.  Godliness is the act of living a good, reverent life towards God and others because of what Jesus has done in us.  It's our ever-growing attempt to become more like Jesus by being imitators of Christ (Eph. 5:1).  And for a godly woman, we have received instruction in 1 Peter 3:3-4, "Do not let your adornment be merely outward - arranging the hair, wearing gold, or putting on fine apparel - rather let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the incorruptible beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is very precious in the sight of God."  Also in 1 Timothy 2:9-10, "...in like manner also, that the women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with propriety and moderation, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or costly clothing, but, which is proper for women professing godliness, with good works."  And even more in 1 Timothy 3:11, "Likewise, their wives must be reverent, not slanderers, temperate, faithful in all things."  I think I've painted a decent picture here of some of what the scripture says about what a godly woman looks like.  

Contentment is where I'm going to focus in on here.  The word means to be sufficient, to be enough, to be full.  Its a beautiful concept.  Contentment can only be found in God through His grace.  He is all sufficient, enough, and full.  Therefore, we can only find it in Him.  Paul tells us in Philippians 4:11, "Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content."  We are told in Hebrews 13:5, "Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have..."    This word contentment is also translated as sufficiency in the scriptures, as we see in II Corinthians 9:8, "And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having sufficiency in all things, may have abundance for every good work."  And in II Corinthians 12:9, when Jesus said, "...My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness..."  Contentment is the confidence of faith in God's sufficiency to provide all my needs and the confidence of the sufficiency of God's grace for every circumstance.  Basically to experience contentment is to experience God's peace.  

Now I am content and confident in God's sufficiency to provide my needs, as this has been an ongoing work that God has been developing in me throughout the past year.  So here is my confession:  I struggle with allowing God's grace to be sufficient for me in every circumstance.  It's something I always aspire to do, and put forth effort to do so.  But I believe that this key component is what God has means to accomplish in me this year.  The aspect of raising the unanswered questions and desires of my heart to God in every situation and allowing Him to just BE enough for me, to just BE content and allow God to fulfill that in me.   Its the ability to honestly tell God, "Thy will be done", and mean it.  I want to take every thought captive and bring it to the submission of Jesus Christ.  I want to take every desire, want, emotion in myself and turn around and give it right back to God to do with it as He pleases.  This is my goal this year.  This is what I aspire to accomplish this year.

"Not that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus has also laid hold of me."  -Philippians 3:12

I have two quotes which go hand in hand with this subject, that come from two amazing people.  Jim and Elizabeth Elliot.  If you have never heard their stories or read their books, I highly encourage you to.  Elizabeth Elliot has had a huge impact on my Christian walk and has been a huge inspiration to me as a godly woman over the years.  

"Help me, Lord, not to mourn or weep for those things, once precious, which you teach me are but dead (whether pleasures, desires, or whatever may be precious to my soul now), but give me a willingness to put them away out of my sight."
- Elizabeth Elliot

"If thou calls me to resign what most I prize, it ne'er was mine. I only give back to thee what is thine. Thy will be done."
-Jim Elliot

Favorite Recipes - Green Bean Almondine

Ok ya'll, seriously, I am failing as a blogger.  I will do better.  Promise!

So much is happening in and around my world and heart that it would take forever to explain it.  Long story, short: God is awesome.  God has healed my heart and I moved on to better things.  But that's a story for another post.  

I wanted to share with ya'll a delicious, healthy, simple recipe.  It's called Green Bean Almondine and its simply amazing!  Brooklyn, who happens to be the biggest junk food junkie, loves this stuff!

Here are your ingredients:

2 cups of fresh green beans

2 tsp unsalted - extra virgin olive oil butter

1/2 cup chopped green onion/shallots

1/4 cup silvered almonds

(you can buy the almonds whole and slice them yourself or but them pre-sliced like I do)

4-6 cups of water

Put butter in a small saucepan with heat on med-low.

Boil about 4-6 cups water in medium saucepan on high heat.

Add shallots/green onion to small saucepan

Add silvered almonds to small saucepan.  Saute.  I prefer mine a tad bit burnt...I think it adds more flavor.  

Check the water, make sure its boiling real good.  Add fresh green beans and parboil for 2 minutes or until they turn light green.  If you boil them much longer and they turn dark, they lose tons of nutrients that gives them their life force.

 Drain green beans

Rinse green beans with cool water until they are lukewarm.

This is what my mixture in the small saucepan looks like when its done.

Put green beans in your dish, add the mixture from the small saucepan.  

Voila!  The end result!  Green Bean Almondine!  Delish!!!

Enjoy!!!

Potty Training Boot Camp & Tool-Kit

Hey ya'll!

We began our absolute last attempt at potty training Rainbow today!  She is 3 years and 2 months old, so it's about time.  We've tried before, but I realized that she wasn't ready.  The last time we tried, she was able...but not willing.  This time she's excited and I really believe a lot of it is due to her speech therapy.  I'm sure that sounds odd.  But our biggest obstacle thus far has been communication.  She couldn't understand me and I couldn't understand her.  It just wasn't working.  She has been in speech therapy now for about a month or two and she's made significant progress in her speech!  Now she is able and willing to potty, and able to communicate with me.  Yay!

We are on day 1.

  We started off the day in pull-ups because I didn't decide until about 1 o'clock to start the actual potty training boot camp, thanks to the motivation of my good friend, Kimberli.  So the chart below says pull-ups and 4 of the stickers under "potty w/ wet pull-up" were from earlier when she could just pee in her pull-up and get away with it.  So before I started, I quickly gathered up materials for the car.  I tossed her 'Cheer For Me Potty' (Fisher Price), wipes, two changes of clothes, and an extra pack of underwear in the trunk of my car for those "to-go" moments.  You know, when they've got to go potty and there is not one anywhere nearby.  Car being potty training prepped?  Check.

After I came back in, I gathered all the indoor supplies.  Lots of older pairs of underwear passed down from  my dear friend, Josie?  Check.  Princess potty seat?  Check.  Step stool Rainbow got from her Uncle Marcus and soon-to-be Aunt Megan for her birthday?  Check.  Rainbow's home-made potty chart made from excess poster-board that we didn't use at her birthday party?  Check.   Dora stickers I bought for this purpose, stuck up on top of the fridge, and then forgot about?  Check.  Leftover Hershey's chocolate bars from the smores we made a week or two ago, to be used for reward?  Check.  Anything else I needed?  Yes, I still needed to let Brooklyn pick out some brand new panties and choose her reward candy.  A short trip to Walmart after her speech therapy took care of those items.  

So it begins...dun, dun, dun!

Rainbow was officially wearing panties by 2pm.  I hid her pull-ups and told her that I didn't know where they went, so we were going to have to wear panties like a big girl now.  She didn't object, at all.  Sweet!  She had two accidents at first, but just barely peed in them before she started yelling, "Pee Pee!  Pee Pee!!!!".  We ran for the potty.  As she pulled her soiled panties off she exclaimed, "YUCK!  Ewww...GROSS!"  Awesome - just the reaction I wanted.  She finished peeing in the potty both times!  Yay! Rainbow gets a piece of chocolate and a sticker of her choice for her chart.  Suddenly, she is all in and excited to go potty!  She went to speech therapy and Walmart, no accident.  We came home and she took a nap, no accident.  Immediately after the nap I asked her if she needed to go potty, to which she replied a hefty "No".  Then she had a small accident, darted for the bathroom, and finished in the potty!  Yay, Rainbow!  You still get a reward because you tried, good job!  We went the rest of the evening without any accidents!!!  She even got up out of bed 3 times needing to go potty so she didn't pee in her panties.  Given, now she's having some trouble sleeping because she doesn't want to go in her panties or miss out on her chocolate treat.  But this shall pass.  Needless to say, Day 1 is going wonderful!  Keep us in your prayers that Day 2 goes even better.  

Our Toolkit:

Things My Divorce Taught Me

Well ya'll, I'm officially a single mother now, as of a week ago.  I can't really say that its much different than the separation was other than the fact that I am, indeed, single again.  It's so odd to not be Mrs. anymore.  Do I need that little "r" to be in my name to be whole?  Certainly not.  In a lot of ways, I'm reconnecting with myself again.  Ya'll know what I'm talking about.  Getting back in touch with "Who" you really are, and not in conjunction with a relationship.  I used to find so much of my self-worth in my identity as a wife, as a mother, as a military spouse.  But now I'm really getting the chance to reconnect with me, just as I am.  I'm listening to my country music now and I'm darn proud of it.  I'm not trying to force myself to like rock music to make someone else happy.  I'm getting back to my roots, enjoying the southern country-ness that I grew up in.  I'm not trying to hide my accent and become more interested in other lifestyles to keep someone else's attention.  I'm doing things I want to do and spending my time how I'd like to now.  I'm not spending all my spare time doing only the things that someone else is interested in so that they will want to spend time with me.  

My divorce has taught me a lot.  I truly believe that although it was intensely difficult, I have become a better and stronger person because of it.  First off, I've learned that I should never have to change who I am and what I'm about to attract and keep my man.  I'm not saying I had to change to attract my ex.  But rather, that I had to change a lot of things in order to keep him and his attention.  He wanted someone who he could share the things he liked with and them be interested in it too.  Well, we never saw eye to eye on that and it should've been a red flag.  Our interests were so different and I thought I'd grow to like the things he did or at least get used to them.  I guess I succeeded in that, therefore losing that part of myself in the process.  Moral of the story:  Find someone who likes the things you like.  Opposites may attract, but find difficulty staying together if both parties are not 100% invested in the relationship.  There is also much to be said about give and take.  It's hard when you give, give, give...and never receive.  Trust me.

Second, I've learned to not be so naive.  Don't just blindly trust someone!  Seriously, this was one of my biggest mistakes.  I took the man at his word, without a doubt in my mind.  Biggest mistake ever.  Make someone prove to you that they are trustworthy.  Make them prove themselves, that they will really be there when you need them too.  They may say all the right things, have all the right words, and the best excuses that could probably be the truth.  But actions speak one hundred-billion times louder than words.  Watch what they do.  Do they answer when you call?  When you desperately need that shoulder to cry on, are they  supposedly "busy"?  Of course there will be the moments when they truly are, but how often is this the reason?  Do their stories add up?  Seriously, do the math.  How long do they take to respond to you?  And if you find yourself thinking, "Well he's just trying to play it cool so he doesn't seem that attached.", or whatever excuse you make for him...think about it.  Do you really want someone who is going to avoid you and play mind games?  I mean, if you want to stay in the dating scene or you want to get in a serious relationship that's doomed to fail, go right ahead.  But if you want something serious, a lasting, life-long relationship with that person...think twice.  I'm telling you from personal experience...if they do it when you are getting together, they will do it throughout your relationship.  They will play games to test you, get what they want, or get the information they want - and it's all for personal gain and satisfaction without a care in the world about how it effects you or your emotions.  Personally, I don't know about ya'll...but I want someone who is going to be upfront and honest with me.  No mind games, no waiting for this and that to happen first, no stringing you along until they find someone to replace you.  Honest, upfront, blunt.  I want to hear, "This is what I'm looking for, this is what I want, this is where I want this to go.  This is what I don't want, this is what I'm trying to avoid, and if xyz is what you are looking for - then feel free to hit the road.  No hard feelings, just a friendship, take care of yourself and better luck next time."  I will do this for anyone else, too.  Maybe it's bold and forward, but it gets business taken care of without all of the unnecessary emotional tension in between.  No one wants to feel things for someone, be made a fool, and have their time wasted.  Life is short.  Why wait in anticipation for something that's not meant to be and won't work out? 

Third, marriage is not for the faint or weary of heart.  It takes two strong and grounded people to make a marriage work.  It takes two people who are willing to fight the good fight till the end, no matter what comes their way.  It takes two people who will never give up on each other.  It takes two people going into it with their eyes and hearts wide open.  It takes two people who will love each other unconditionally - even when they don't feel "in love", even when they look horrible, even when they are sick, even when they are at their worst and lowest - no matter what!  Marriage is not something to take lightly.  When you say, "I do" - it's forever.  If you don't feel like you are in love with your spouse anymore, you stick it out till you fall back in love with them again.  A successful marriage happens when two people fall in love many, many times in a lifetime - but always with the same person!  It takes two people willing to compromise, bend a little, give in a little, sacrifice a little.  It takes two people who will put the other's best interests and feelings above their own.  Simply put.  Not all the flowery feelings and sweet nothings, though they are nice.  But true love - defined by action as well as words, unconditionally, forever.  If that is not something you are willing to do, commit to, and dedicate yourself and your life to...then don't get married.  And if you know you would do all of this, but are unsure of your significant other's desire or ability to do all those things...then don't get married.  Trust me when I tell you that you can have all this in your heart, but if the apple of your eye isn't doing the same...it will end, painfully.  

Don't get me wrong, ya'll.  Love is a beautiful, many splendid thing.  God knows that it is one of my heart's deepest desires to find real love and have the kind of marriage I've described above.  It's something I've yet to find anywhere but in my dreams.  But I do hope to find it someday...and sooner than later in my personal opinion.  I'd love to have a partner in life, to feel like my family was complete again, and have someone alongside me to raise my beautiful girls.  But if that's not coming anytime soon, that's ok.  And if its not in the cards for me at all, that's ok too.  I've learned, like Paul said, that I need to be content in whatever situation I'm in.  If I'm married, be content.  If I'm single, be content.  Life is now.  This moment is here at this time and I'll never have it again.  I can't go back to yesterday.  I can't go forward to tomorrow.  All I have is right now.  So I'm going to have the best, most amazing right now...right now!  Let go of the past, let go of your worries, and live in the moment.  It's literally all you've got.  So make it the best you possibly can and love every minute of it!  :)

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This video is of my oldest child, Rainbow.  She was doing her "Georgia Peaches Dance".  It's way...too...cute.

Mingle Monday

To all my loyal readers and my fellow bloggers:

Check out this blog and join Mingle Monday if you are a blogger to find some new blogs full of interesting stuff!

Mingle Monday